I’ve said for months now that I love the Twins. They’re beautiful and I’m so grateful for Dr. Franklyn Elliott and his skills as an artist and surgeon. As happy as I am with them, that doesn’t negate the fact that they are, well let’s face it, Gazongas. These aren’t sweater puppies, they’re sweater Great Danes.
Remember Fluffy from the first Harry Potter movie? Yeah. Like that.
And so, because I now have Monster Tits, I have “outgrown” my formal wardrobe. I have a stunning fully beaded silk sleeveless shell. It won’t zip. Why? Monster Tits.
I have a full length chocolate-brown velvet gown. It’s threatening to rip. Why? Monster Tits.
My beautiful red and gold velvet pattered bolero shrug with beaded fringe? You guessed it. It fell victim to Monster Tits. And sadly, the matching shirt must go with it.
And finally, my black sheer silk with the beaded blue and green floral pattern with sheer jacket? About one size two small.. Through the chest.
I LOVE those pieces. Now they get to find a new home through a local consignment shop.
I was going to say that perhaps disappointment was too strong a word but it isn’t. Adding to the disappointment is frustration. Now I have to lay out more money for formal wear because my dear, sweet husband has surprised me with a four night cruise for my birthday (Jan. 30). If you have ever been on a cruise or have seen cruises shown on the Travel channel, you know that there is a Formal Night. Rather than waiting, now I’ve got to spend the money for a formal gown.
On TOP of all that, at the beginning of March we’re going on the Amazing Adventure 5: Skeptics of the Caribbean Cruise. Since that’s a 7 day cruise, there are not one but TWO formal events.
I’ve already found a gorgeous evening gown on IGIGI.com http://bit.ly/6HbPfJ Now I have to find another. I’m hoping that the consignment shop that I’m going to tomorrow will have something reasonable and stunning in my size.
I knew that I would have to replace wardrobe pieces. I’ve already talked about having to donate a big chunk of my casual wardrobe. I just didn’t make the connection to my formal wardrobe as well.
And so, tonight Dear Reader, I am signing off as:
Disappointed and Frustrated