The Movies In My Head

11 Jan

Originally Drafted on 9/24/08: This is another post in the Flashback series.

We all have these movies that play in our heads: Telling off the boss; That comeback we *should* have thought of 10 minutes ago; Kissing your favorite movie star. We all have a million “what if” moments we stockpile and replay on a regular basis.

My movies go something like this:

FADE IN on our bedroom. DH sitting on bed:

DH: I’m sorry. We just can’t afford to pay for your reconstruction surgery.” FADE OUT

Scene 2: Location: Bridge at Night. Camera follows human silhouette plummeting from bridge. FADE TO BLACK

Yeah. Really stable.

From a logical standpoint I know that we’ll be able to get the financing for the surgery. As a last resort we can take the money from our investment account. So it IS going to happen.  But thanks to the latest release from What-If Studios, I’m still imagining being stuck like this for the rest of my life.

I’ve been dealing with this for 14 months now and I’m looking at another five months before the first surgery.  Then probably another three months before I have nipples again.  After all that, there’s at least a year of healing. Fortunately there are good drugs and I’m getting in shape. I’ve already lost 12 pounds.

I’m just emotionally wrung out and more than ready for this to be over with.

Why May? Scheduling conflicts abound. December is obvious. January is my birthday. February is my youngest son’s birthday. March WOULD be okay, BUT April 4 is our wedding anniversary and April 25 is DH’s birthday. Then, we have BaltiCon in May. That gives me 11 weeks to recover before the rigors of DragonCon. So THAT’S why I’m waiting until May.

In the mean time I’m trying not to buy tickets to more of the What-If Studios productions.


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