11.04.09
Check Up Part 3
I forgot to include something in yesterday’s post. Dr. Elliott had mentioned that he wanted to make sure that my breast tissue has become softer. For the first few weeks right after surgery, my new boobies were really hard and stiff. They were actually very hard. It reminded me of how hard my breasts were after the initial implant surgery.
I pointed out a place across the top of my left breast that, to me, felt harder that the rest of the breast tissue. After gently prodding at it a bit in examination Dr. Elliott explained that the harder area is the top of the muscle flap. He also explained that in comparison to what HE meant my hard it was actually very soft and pliant.
Something that I found to be extremely bizarre is that where I thought had keloid scarring, upon examination, appeared to have nothing of the sort. I am chalking this up to a slightly poor fitting Caique bra from Lane Bryant. It is just a little too small and it makes the scar line feel a little lumpy after a whole day of wearing that type of bra.
That’s one more reason to have a proper bra fitting done. Even if you think it’s been done properly, sometimes it hasn’t. Even though their customer service is really, REALLY bad,
11.03.09
Check Up Part 2
Dr. Elliott is EXTREMELY pleased with how well the Twins are doing. He’s thrilled with how much they’ve softened and how well the scars are fading. He’s also pleased with how my back looks.
While he was looking and “groping” (forgive me Dr. Elliott, I don’t know what else to call it when you check to see how they feel) we talked about the things I was curious about. First, I found out the reason my back has that plasticky feeling like someone set down a layer of plastic wrap across a wide section of my back.
The reason for that is that he basically disected my back, probably doing more surgical maneuvering back there than in my chest. The crackly feeling is where scar tissue has formed in kind of a sheet. It will probably take another six months or so for that to release. He gave the same prognosis for the numb areas, although those could take even longer.
We also talked about how subjective the term “recovery” is. You “recover” in the recovery room. You “recover” in the hospital. You “recover” after the surgery and that can take over a year dependent on which aspect of healing we’re talking about. For instance it took me about six months to get my endurance level back to where it was. Some people take more time. Others take less.
It’s subjective.
We also discussed nipple reconstruction. I told him it probably wouldn’t be until this time next year. He said it didn’t matter. We could do it tomorrow, next week or five years from now. Personally *I* was just relieved that he wasn’t planning to retire any time soon.
Another thing we touched on was doing a breast lift. His concern is that there wouldn’t be much point to it because as heavy as the Twins are, they would end up right back where they are in no time at all. I would have to lose at least 30 pounds before it would become feasible.
My big issue with that is around that point the Twins will start getting smaller. As I’ve written before, to watch them shrink away is like watching my original breasts rot away. I just can’t handle that right now. I just can’t. As i sit here typing I can feel the panic rising and the tears filling my eyes. I CAN’T lose them again.
Okay, okay, I know logically that I’m not losing them. They’re a part of me and I love them dearly. I’m just SO not ready for that. And for the first time in my life I’m content to weigh 218.
We also discussed the two little places on my sides that look like little handles. he called them puckers I think. (Dr. Elliott, if you read this please leave a comment and correct my verbage). He said they were normal and occurred as part of the surgery. We could do a little lipo to lessen them but to tuck the skin would require another incision. Dr. Elliott didn’t seem very keen on another couple of incisions on me and I’m really quite okay with that. He explained that when you do the tummy tuck type breast reconstruction you get the same thing at the hip bone area.
Dr. Elliott made a point of mentioning that he was SO happy we had gone with the latissimus flap reconstruction rather than the tummy tuck. We both had been extremely concerned about possible complications. The tummy tuck procedure simply carries more risk and more risk was the LAST thing I needed.
So all in all the Twins are doing great. He wants to see me again Aprilish for my one year check up. In the mean time I REALLY hope that he checks in. He seemed really interested in my blogs.
And in case I haven’t said it enough, he’s an amazing doctor. Every woman who has to go through reconstruction for ANY reason should go see Dr. Elliott at Atlanta Plastic Surgery (http://www.atlplastic.com).
11.02.09
Seven Month Checkup
Today I’m going to see Dr. Elliott for my seven month check up. Normally it would be six months but he cut me a little slack because life has been a bit insane lately with Ken’s new job, me taking over our business, school and general family issues.
I’m sure he’s going to say everything is okay. There are some things I want to cover with him though. First, a wide swath of my back still feels like it is covered in plastic wrap. I wish I had some other way to explain it. It just feels like a big square of my back has had a cracky plastic coating painted over the top. Or maybe like someone laid down wide strips of packing tape. I really hope he understands this analogy.
I also still have numb spots in places. The other night my right armpit itched abominably but I have no sensation in that area. You wanna talk weird? Try itching someplace that’s numb. THAT’LL throw your brain for a loop.
I also want to get his opinion on the small area of keloid scarring. Please see the entry on 9/30/09 for more about this topic. It’s not much but I think he ought to know.
I also need to tell him that we won’t be able to afford my nipple reconstruction surgery until around this time next year. Then I want to ask him what he thinks about the Japanese practice of inserting pearls under the skin for nipple protrusion. Unfortunately I cannot find a reference to that at the moment. As experienced as Dr. Elliott is though I’m sure he’s heard of it IF it’s something that is actually done.
Until recently about 2/3 of all nipple reconstructions failed. Dr. Elliott has gone to incredible lengths to reassure me that with current techniques that won’t happen. It IS normal for there to be some shrinkage though.
I’ll report more on this later.
11.01.09
Surgery #2
As my regular readers know I developed necrosis two weeks after the October 2nd breast augmentation and lift surgery in 2007. After several weeks of Hell I was scheduled for a second surgery on November 2. This surgery was for the purposes of removing the implants and the remaining necrotic tissue. We showed up in the afternoon at the surgical center – which we had to pay the fee for – I was prepped and before I knew it, part two of my nightmare had begun.
When I was able I looked at what had been done. It seemed, in retrospect, Frankenstinian. The line of vertical sutures looked like someone had whip stitched the skin together. I also found out that, on the left side, there had been a half inch spot left open.
I also found out that over 300 ccs of serous fluid had built up in each pocket. The implants were both intact. That explained the pressure and the bubble under my flesh. Fortunately this time the HiQ put in what passed for really crappy drains. He had inserted open-ended surgical tubing. The outer ends were covered in gauze to absorb the leaking serous fluid that my body produced. Compared to the closed-system drains I had after my reconstruction, these things were positively primitive.
I was also an A cup now down from a DD cup and before that a C cup. This wasn’t nesecarilly a bad thing. I finally had the ski slope breast shape I had been after from the beginning. By ski slope I mean the breasts that are heavy and rounded on the bottom and on the top the breast gently slopes down to be capped by a pert, rosy nipple.
I was just missing the nipple.
The HiQ assured me that after i had healed, we could do reconstruction. At this point I was already starting to have my doubts. But I’ll talk more about that later.
For those of you joining me from NaNoBloMo and reading my blog for the first time, please go read the first post for more information about what BoobCast is all about.
10.13.09
Nipples Revisited
This weekend Ken and I drove down to Disney’s Vero Beach Resort. They have this great little second story restaurant that overlooks the ocean. We like to go out there, watch the ocean, enjoy the breeze off the water and get a little something to nibble on.
Saturday afternoon as we were getting ready to leave a couple came up from the water and sat down. She must have been cold because her nipples were fully extended through her swimsuit.
Up until that moment I was completely satisfied with the reconstructed breasts I have. Please understand that I love my Twins. The square-ish corners have evened out nicely. They’ve got a really nice rounded look to them now. They’re also finally soft and pliable while still being somewhat firm. Even without all those changes I would still be happy beyond words to have them.
I was really startled to realize that a part of me still doesn’t feel complete. I’m definitely not mentally ready to have another surgery. Even a minor one that only involves topical tissues. If I WAS ready we can’t afford it for a while yet. The nipple reconstruction will end up being around $9,000. About $7K for the surgery and the rest is the fee for the outpatient surgical facility.
Dr. Elliott always said that I would know when I was ready to have the first surgery. He said (paraphrased) that there would come a point where the feelings I had about the mangled wreckage that once was my chest would outweigh the fears I had and I would know when I was ready.
It is the same with nipple reconstruction. I know I am not ready for another surgery yet, financial situation aside. Having that moment of realization that I miss having nipples, however, is the first step in that direction.
10.08.09
Nope. Still Not Ready.
October 2nd was my two year anniversary. I keep trying to write posts about the first two weeks. Every time I get to the point that I start talking about the pressure, I look back on things I wrote back then and I start to tear up. I still don’t know exactly how I muscled my way through the ordeal. I guess I’m just tougher than I look, eh?
I also spent a good deal of time trying to block out and forget the things that happened. I didn’t keep written records and I wish i would have taken photos in the first two weeks. But I didn’t. Even Hubby’s memory is pretty sketchy.
Neither of us can remember if the following incident is in the second or third week after the initial surgery. It DID happen some time within the first three weeks though.
One night I felt a great deal of pressure in my chest, as though there was a very heavy someone standing on a board across my chest. Hubby called the HiQ’s answering service because I was having problems breathing. The only thing that seemed to relieve the pressure was to take off the surgical bra and lay on my back. Even then that only worked for a little while.
Hubby had to call the answering service TWICE before the HiQ called back. When the HiQ called, Hubby explained the problem. I was promptly told NOT to lie down and to put the surgical bra back on. It was also suggested that Hubby get me a Valium and that nothing was wrong and I was just having an anxiety attack.
And that’s enough for now.
10.01.09
Things They Don’t Tell You
As I continue to heal I figure things out. The latest is the reason my chest ached for longer than it could have. Keep in mind before the initial surgery I was a B+/C- cup. Little boobies…by comparison anyway.
I had heard about back pain caused by larger breasts but no one ever told me that they could ache and hurt just from their own weight. For quite a while after the surgery I wore shelf bras because they were so comfortable. Even after I was cleared to wear a bra, I still, for some time, preferred to wear the shelf bras.
BUT when I did, there were times when my cleavage ached as though there was a small elephant standing on it. It wasn’t until I talked to my best friend about it. Her girls are almost the same size as mine and are completely natural so I know she has experience with this.
I’m just chalking this up to another thing they just don’t think to tell you.
09.30.09
Keloid Scars
I may I have covered this topic before but not as it applied to me, personally. I noticed something last night after I took off my bra. There is a two to three inch area on the underside of each of my new breasts that has some keloid scarring. These spots didn’t have tape on them consistently as they are furthest out towards my sides and the tape kept coming off there.
Imagine if skin could simmer like water and then be frozen in that state. That’s what keloid scars look like. Here’s a photo of keloid scars on someone’s chest.
Doctors do not understand exactly why keloids form in certain people or situations and not in others. Changes in the cellular signals that control growth and proliferation could be related to the process of keloid formation, but these changes have not yet been characterized scientifically.
The methods now available to treat keloids are:
- Cortisone injections (intralesional steroids): These are safe and not very painful. Injections are usually given once per month until the maximum benefit is obtained. Injections are safe (very little steroid gets into the bloodstream) and usually help flatten keloids; however, steroid injections can also make the flattened keloid redder by stimulating the formation of more superficial blood vessels. (These can be treated using a laser; see below.) The keloid may look better after treatment than it looked to start with, but even the best results leave a mark that looks and feels quite different from the surrounding skin.
- Surgery: This is risky, because cutting a keloid can trigger the formation of a similar or even larger keloid. Some surgeons achieve success by injecting steroids or applying pressure dressings to the wound site after cutting away the keloid. Radiation after surgical excision has also been used.
- Laser: The pulsed-dye laser can be effective at flattening keloids and making them look less red. Treatment is safe and not very painful, but several treatment sessions may be needed. These may be costly, since such treatments are not generally covered by insurance plans.
- Silicone sheets: This involves wearing a sheet of silicone gel on the affected area for several hours a day for weeks or months, which is hard to sustain. Results are variable. Some doctors claim similar success with compression dressings made from materials other than silicone.
- Cryotherapy: Freezing keloids with liquid nitrogen may flatten them but often darkens the site of treatment.
- Interferon: Interferons are proteins produced by the body’s immune systems that help fight off viruses, bacteria, and other challenges. In recent studies, injections of interferon have shown promise in reducing the size of keloids, though it’s not yet certain whether that effect will be lasting. Current research is underway using a variant of this method, applying topical imiquimod (Aldara), which stimulates the body to produce interferon.
- Fluorouracil: Injections of this chemotherapy agent, alone or together with steroids, have been used as well for treatment of keloids.
- Radiation: Some doctors have reported safe and effective use of radiation to treat keloids.
This is not a very common complication, but it can happen. There doesn’t seem to be a bias. It happens equally in men and women as well as all ethnicities.
08.07.09
Why The Reboot?
I mentioned in yesterday’s blog post that as of Monday I would be starting my story over from the beginning. I’m sure many of you are wondering why. If you go back to my early blog posts you’ll see that although there is a little bit of detail, there are some unanswered questions.
When I first started this blog I was very emotionally unstable. I left out a great deal of detail simply because it was far too painful for me to talk about then. Now that I can think more clearly and have more distance, I can tell my story much better. The more details I can convey, the more benefit this blog has for you, the reader.
I’ll be taking the weekend off. Starting Monday 9/10/09 I’ll start back at the beginning. By the beginning, I mean I’ll talk about the self esteem issues behind the first plastic surgery and the role I feel society and commercialism contributes to low self esteem. In subsequent episodes I’ll also be talking about tuberous breasts and why they are considered a deformity.
To quote Heath Ledger’s character William in “A Knight’s Tale”: Welcome to New World. God save you, if it is right that he should do so.
08.06.09
Choices To Be Made
I’ve been writing this blog for almost 150 entries now and I’ve noticed a few things. First, I get higher reader numbers when my posts have titles like: X-Rated or Boobie Boggles. Hell, that second one got the highest readership numbers yet. Second, I get more inquiries from the medically-based posts that I do.
When I talk about my experiences with the variety of issues I’ve had between the augment and lift and the reconstruction, I get more genuine questions and actual sharing of information. So with this in mind I’ve come to a conclusion.
Screw that. I’m sick of trying to get readers by luring them in with titillating titles (no pun intended). I’m just going to talk about what’s going on, what I’ve gone through and the things I’ve experienced. THAT is what helps people. If I happen to grow my readership, great. If I don’t, I’ll be sad that I’m not getting information out to more people.
I’m just not going to bend over backwards anymore trying to expand my readership the cheap, superficial way.
With that in mind, I will be going back to the beginning. I’m going to start filling in the HUGE gaps in my story. Starting Monday August 10th, BoobCast gets a do-over. I plan to start with the reason behind my initial desire to have the breast augmentation and lift.
I’ll talk about the appointments I went on, how plastic surgeons grade breast degradation and all my initial preparations. I’ll be adding more links to relevant medical sites and I’ll be putting up some photos, with the appropriate warnings and cautions when that time comes.
