11.04.09
Check Up Part 3
I forgot to include something in yesterday’s post. Dr. Elliott had mentioned that he wanted to make sure that my breast tissue has become softer. For the first few weeks right after surgery, my new boobies were really hard and stiff. They were actually very hard. It reminded me of how hard my breasts were after the initial implant surgery.
I pointed out a place across the top of my left breast that, to me, felt harder that the rest of the breast tissue. After gently prodding at it a bit in examination Dr. Elliott explained that the harder area is the top of the muscle flap. He also explained that in comparison to what HE meant my hard it was actually very soft and pliant.
Something that I found to be extremely bizarre is that where I thought had keloid scarring, upon examination, appeared to have nothing of the sort. I am chalking this up to a slightly poor fitting Caique bra from Lane Bryant. It is just a little too small and it makes the scar line feel a little lumpy after a whole day of wearing that type of bra.
That’s one more reason to have a proper bra fitting done. Even if you think it’s been done properly, sometimes it hasn’t. Even though their customer service is really, REALLY bad,
10.01.09
Things They Don’t Tell You
As I continue to heal I figure things out. The latest is the reason my chest ached for longer than it could have. Keep in mind before the initial surgery I was a B+/C- cup. Little boobies…by comparison anyway.
I had heard about back pain caused by larger breasts but no one ever told me that they could ache and hurt just from their own weight. For quite a while after the surgery I wore shelf bras because they were so comfortable. Even after I was cleared to wear a bra, I still, for some time, preferred to wear the shelf bras.
BUT when I did, there were times when my cleavage ached as though there was a small elephant standing on it. It wasn’t until I talked to my best friend about it. Her girls are almost the same size as mine and are completely natural so I know she has experience with this.
I’m just chalking this up to another thing they just don’t think to tell you.
09.12.09
Boobie Pics
After the last entry about extensive bruising, I dug out the old photos. I don’t have any pics of the bruises on my ribcage. What I DO have is some shots of the bruising on my former breasts. The main bruising seems to be where the necrosis developed: On the underside of both breasts and at the areolae. The photos show deep black and blue bruising on either side of the suture line underneath my breasts and on and around the areolae. The first photos were taken a week after the initial surgery so some of the bruising may have already faded. The breast bruising did not though.
After my second check up I was told that I was required to wear a surgical bra 24/7 to support the new girls. The bras I was given didn’t really feel like what I would expect compression bras to feel like though. I would have thought that they would feel more like being wrapped in an ace bandage. This felt more like your typical thin fabric bra though. For convenience and comfort it fastened in the front.
Strangely I hadn’t started to worry much at this point in the narrative. I WAS a bit concerned about the bruising but everything I read said that bruising was normal so I trusted that. Even if I hadn’t, I don’t think there was anything I could have done. I think I was doomed from the start.
The HiQ (Hack in Question for new readers) maintained a wait and see approach in all things. Every time I asked a question he dodged it with either “I don’t know” or “Let’s just wait and see”.
We’re fast coming up on the really bad stuff so again I’ll beg your indulgence for the sporadic nature of the posts. I WILL tell this story because people need to know what can happen when plastic surgery goes horribly awry. It’s just difficult even two years later.
08.13.09
Gimme Credit & Implant Fitting
In the business office we talked about various ways to pay for the surgery. Of course, as I mentioned the surgical fees were on barter. The fees for the surgical facility, The Bougainvillea Clinique, as well as the implants themselves, were to be fully paid for two weeks prior to surgery. That’s where Care Credit came in.
Care Credit does financing for a wide range of cosmetic surgical procedures. I got them to finance me for the full amount over a three year span of payments. If I remember right, the payments were under $200 a month. The interest rate was pretty rough though. It was somewhere around 9% if memory serves. Of course I didn’t care. I was headed full boar into this.
With the financing in place and confirmed, we set a date for October 6th. All that was left was to figure out what size implants I wanted. Now THIS is a process in and of itself.
I was told to get some knee high stockings and raw rice because rice is the most accurate type of filler as far as weight goes. One cup of raw rice equals approximately 236 ccs. The following table gives more conversions.
1 cup = 236cc
½ cup = 118cc
¾ cup = 177cc
¼ cup = 59cc
1/3 cup = 78cc
2/3 cup = 156cc
1/8 cup = 30cc
So you start by filling two knee highs with one cup of rice, lightly tie it off so that you can untie it again later and stuff them into a properly fitting sports bra. I did four different sets so that I could compare the various volumes. 425cc is an approximate full D cup so play with the volumes and see what looks best. I ended up with about 625 ccs which is about a DD.
Once I had the implant size figured out, I called in the volume that I had settled on. NOW I think I should have been fitted in the doctor’s office, but they had their own routine. I figured these people knew what they were doing so I just went along with it.
Two weeks before the surgical date I received a box in the mail. In it was vitamins to fortify my system, antibiotics as a preemptive strike against infection and Arnica for bruising. I was given instructions for what to take at what point. So at two weeks out I started the regiment.
Tomorrow I’ll talk about the surgery itself.
08.03.09
Boobie Boggles
When I was cleared to wear bras I went and spent insane amounts of money on five bras and matching panties. They’re all gorgeous and lacey and flowery and they really make me feel feminine when I wear them. They’re also not very utilitarian. Sure I can wear them as my daily bras but they just don’t look good under certain tops.
My Prima Donna bras, because they’re embroidered and have little flowers on some of them, just don’t work under form-fitting tops. You can see the fabric of the bras through clothes like that. Because of that, I went bra shopping at Lane Bryant on Saturday afternoon.
Lane Bryant sizes bras with a tape measure. This is completely unlike the visual measuring system that the ladies at Intimacy use. Lane Bryant (referred to as LB from this point forward) measures at the rib cage, at the nipple and at the top of the breast. According to their measurements, I am a 38 band size and a DD cup.
I have not lost weight and my Intimacy bras still fit perfectly. The Cacique bras carried by LB fit me FAR differently than the Intimacy bras. I ended up with four full coverage soft cup bras in a 40DD by that company. I must have tried on 15 different bras before they found what fit right. I even tried on a 44 band size and it was REALLY big on me. You could have fit kittens in the cups along with the Twins because the gap was so big. The woman helping me also pulled the band away from my body probably about 4-6 inches.
It just boggles my mind that a thing that is supposed to be engineered to fit and support our assets can have that wide a range in size on the same person. You’d think there would be consistency in bras and bra makers.
The lady who assisted me gave me a great hint for how to know if a bra fits really well or not. First you’ve got to bend over and adjusted your girls so that they’re fully in the cup, including the sides. That stuff that’s flopping over your side strap? That’s also part of your breast. If your bra does that, it’s too small.
If you raise both arms all the way up and the bridge between the two cups comes off your breast bone, the bra is too big. If the bridge doesn’t lie flat against your breastbone at all, the bra is too small. If someone can pull the back strap out away from your body more than a couple fingers wide, the bra is too big. This is an excellent example of someone wearing the wrong sized bra and exactly what’s wrong: http://tinyurl.com/caengb
This is why it’s important for every woman to be professionally fitted. It’s up to us. We have to take care of our Boobies the best that we can. Most women are wearing the wrong sized bra because they don’t know any better. You have a responsibility to yourself to get out there and get educated. Find a local lingere store and see if they do bra fittings. You don’t even have to buy anything from the shop. Just get fitted and find out what band and cup size you REALLY are.
07.26.09
Midnight eMails
Regardless of the fact that I knew I had to be up early this morning to travel back home from Atlanta, I was down in the lounge at the Westin around midnight. I had, as usual, forgotten to ask Dr. Elliott a few things about the revision surgery we talked about at my appointment on Thursday afternoon.
We had hoped that the little spot near my cleavage would have rounded out a bit more by now, but it is still kind of squarish, So he’s going to kind of pinch that skin together to round it off. He has also suggested doing a breast lift because, as you’ve all seen from the first photo, the Twins are kind of droopy.
Of course, as part of my late night meanderings, I did research on various types of breast lifts. He did not mention a specific type. However in his reply to my email he DID say that there would be no new scars. He would simply make use of the ones I have now. This leads me to believe that he’s thinking of using THIS type of lift: http://www.breastlift4you.com/techniques_incisions.htm
As you can see, this type of crescent incision would use the scars I already have and would be a moderate lift. If the lift is included in the cost of the revisions and nipple creation, I have the general attitude of “Why the hell not?”. He’s going to be doing surgery anyway and I’m paying for it so why not just do the “one stop shop” deal and get it all done and over with at the same time? Dr. Elliott is enough of a pro to be able to do it and do it well.
There ARE other types of breast lifts that, as with the crescent lift above, do not reduce breast tissue volume the way the Anchor Lift does. http://www.plasticsurgery4u.com/procedure_folder/breast_ptosis_surgery2.html This site shows some good examples of the Donut and Lollipop lift.
I always feel better after talking with Dr. Elliott. So I think that, when we can manage the cost, I’ll be having the revision surgery. One thing I learned from my mother-in-law before she died was :Never Settle. So I might as well get what I want.
07.19.09
Briefs
***I’m STILL waiting for a call from Dr. Elliott regarding the whole weight loss/losing boobie volume issue. This is really the first time I’ve actually been truly disappointed with him. He didn’t call last week nor did his PA. Needless to say I’m somewhat miffed. I’ll be looking for an explanation when I call on Monday. I know he sees patients then.
***I heard back from Paul about the prosthetic nipples. He said he can do anything I want. So NOW all I have to do is decide what I want. Not as easy as it sounds. If I decide not to opt for surgery, these babies are my nips for life. Or until the wear out and I have to get new ones.
Mail order nipples… Now THERE’S a modern concept for ya.
***A friend of mine from another site who just recently started reading my blog said that I need to “pull myself out of the Abyss”. Someone else pointed out that the word “survivor” is frequently used as a crutch. Now THAT took the wind out of my sails. Those two comments have me wondering just how much of this blog consists of me whining about how truly awful things have been. I would LIKE to think that there is some helpful information in all of this. As for pulling myself out of the Abyss, THAT is what this blog is about for me. I have been in some very dark places since this all began. The things I’ve been discussing are surface issues by comparison. I know I still have healing to do.
There are times when I’m not very good at recognizing my limitations and boundaries. This is one of those times. I’m still somewhat enmeshed in the misery I suffered. Some days it clings to me like cobwebs. I wonder how much longer this sorrow will be with me. I suspect it will be years more because I have a book to write.
I also have allowed a few people to have a great deal of influence in my life. I wonder sometimes how much I’m doing just to make them happy and how much of what I do are things that *I* want for me. It’s difficult when I can’t seem to separate my desires from theirs FOR me. Not long ago I was explaining to someone that I tend to analyze the crap out of everything. So I am. It’s just part of the “Maria” package.
***That troublesome spot on my back has mostly scabbed over. Now it’s just a matter of time before it completely heals up. The wet-to-dry bandages really helped. The other side that had separated and scabbed is healed up now and has blended into the rest of the scar line.
***Intimacy has the most beautiful bras and panties for DDD+ cup sizes. The engineering that goes into these bras is phenomenal. Unfortunately, their customer service is HORRIBLE! I’ve had to keep calling multiple times to check on a back order. I called three times and left two messages before someone called me back to let me know that my original fitter was no longer with the company. Then it took 20 minutes for them to find my original back order paperwork and verify that those items were ones I still wanted. At that point, after being placed on hold for about 5 minutes I was told they were out of stock but would be getting them in soon.
Six weeks later I got a message saying that my back order was in. So I called back, ended up leaving two messages in a week and FINALLY got a human being a week after that. It took another 20 minutes to find and verify my back order ONLY to be told that they were out of one item that I ordered and it would have to be shipped from the Boston store.
If Intimacy could just get their act together customer service-wise, they would be more popular than Victoria’s Secret. Intimacy’s lingerie is better made, more supportive and will last longer. PLUS they offer life time tailoring. If you lose a substantial amount of weight, they will tailor your bras to fit as many times as you want.
07.13.09
Bra Day Redux
After wearing my pretty blue Prima Donna Kensington bra (http://tinyurl.com/npkxnm) and panties today, I have great news to report. The skin on my back has healed sufficiently so as to not tear under pressure the way it did last time I tried to wear a bra. That was right after my one month check up.
I wore the bra for about 9 hours today and found it to be VERY comfortable. I only had to adjust the band once. I’ve also healed enough to be able to feel the bra strap on my back. For the most part at least. My nerves have not completely healed yet. There are still areas of numbness but not to the extent that they were. Those numb areas are actually getting more pronounced feeling as time passes. Eventually I’ll actually be able to feel everything on my back again.
In other words, if my fingers slip and I snap myself with my bra band, I now KNOW I snapped myself. Sometimes pain is something to grudgingly accept. In this case it indicates progress in healing.
Yay pain??
I’m not sure if this progress means that I’m going to dive head first into daily bra wearing again. Somehow, I don’t think so. The bras are beautiful and they do lovely things for the TWINS, as you have all borne witness to. I’m really rather enjoying using the shelf bras though. Even though the Prima Donna bras ARE comfortable, the shelf bras are even more comfortable.
While I do think I’ll be wearing bras more often, I think that for the time being I’m going to stick with my shelf bras as my daily wear mainstay. That may change with a little more time. I’m just going to have to take it as it comes and see what happens. As usual.
07.12.09
Bra Day
Since everything seems to be healing so nicely. I’m wearing one of my new Prima Donna bras today. I’ll report back about whether or not I have any complications from it due to skin delicacy or other issues.
07.08.09
The Check Up
This afternoon I’ve got an appointment with Dr. Guy, the local Uber plastic surgeon. She’ll be checking on the progress of the tissue overgrowth on my back in that one spot. According to Hubby, who can actually SEE what’s going on back there, it’s closing up FINALLY. I’m still going to hold off on wearing bras for a few more weeks though. Just to give that spot time to FULLY heal.
I’ve also found a way to make these shelf bra camis more supportive. There’s a bra-maker supply shop here (http://www.bramakerssupply.com) that has everything I need to replace these flimsy straps with wider ones. The elastic under the breasts is pretty wide already so i won’t have to replace that. All I have to do is hand dye the new shoulder straps to match and sew them in. VOILA! New, supportive cami shelf bras. Since I live in Florida, wearing two tops in the middle of summer is just too hot. So this solves both the problem of support and the heat issue. I’ll post pics when they’re done.
The *other* checking up thing I have to do is call Patti at Dr. Elliott’s office. She was supposed to call me about where I could get silicone prosthetic nipples locally. Since I don’t have an existing nipple to be cast and copied I may not have to see someone to be fitted. But then as large as the new Twins are, I may. I have NO idea ho that works really.
That’s one more thing I’ll have to report back on one I know something. I REALLY want to have the prosthetics in time for DragonCon. I’m still REALLY not in a head space for another surgery yet. Even if I COULD afford it right now, the last thing I’m looking forward to is being cut on more even if it IS just minor, in-patient surgery.
I’m afraid I can’t find any photos of the star flap nipple reconstruction. I did put up a link in an earlier post though. I’ll dig around and see what I can find and edit this post if I can find an appropriate image.
